I'm thinking maybe it's time to thin out the toys

I had a dream last night where I was trying to drive my car but there was so many baby dolls in there I could hardly move. Baby dolls with vacant eyes and plastic hairless scalps. And some of them had clearly gone in the bath with Lily and Anya as they were dripping from every seam and opening, peeing on the seats and weeping bathtub tears in the cup holders.

And my own real live babies? Nowhere to be found. No curly topped Lil or shrieking with glee Ani. Just smooth plastic, clicking eyes, ill-fitting doll clothes with Velcro closings and not a single sign of genitalia, made all the more creepy by the occasional mechanic sound of Elmo singing.

I don't know if I'll ever sleep again.