playgroup beach day

So I hate the beach.

OK, that's not totally true. I don't really hate the beach. I just can't stand the drama it inspires in my wee people. See this is what happens every time we go:

The water is scary
So scary that we can't go near it
Then a child touches the water with her toe and instantly needs to pee
So we truck across the wide beach to the bathrooms, complaining all the way
Back to the water
One child starts considering it while the other clings desperately
I try to shake said child loose
It rarely works
Then the water isn't so scary and happiness ensues
Then the water deigns to touch my child’s face and the world ends
If it doesn't end then for a while all is good
Until it's not
That's about the time when someone needs to pee
The idea of peeing in the ocean is foreign to them and yet, totally acceptable to me as I gaze back across the wide beach
The finer points of the peeing options are discussed in detail
If I'm lucky, she'll drop trou and do what the good Lord intended
If I'm not, there's another whiney hike to be made
Then someone needs to eat
Right now
So snacks are offered
Hands are sandy
Crying is obviously the best way to deal with sandy hands
Sandy hands and careless kids leads to sandy food
It's the end of the world
I look at a clock and decide now's a good time to run like hell
Decide to take the kids with me
Whine, fuss and cry all the way to the car
Get home and wash off food
Make them eat wet sandwiches
Throw everyone into the shower
More whining, fussing and crying (think, "there's water on my face, WHAT A WORLD! WHAT A WORLD!")
NAP TIME, DAMMIT!

Ahhhhhh.

And that's why I hate the beach. Maybe I'll love it again some day if I get to go BY MYSELF. Or bring two adults per child. And I'm not one of them.

But hey, at least I got some good photos and video!