My lovely new copy of Karen Walrond's The Beauty of Different, tucked among the girls books and a couple magazines.
In 2010 I went back to full time work, outside of the home.
Which, of course, changed everything.
Especially when you couple it with Mark returning to freelance work, having TWO kids in school and my insane decision to become part of another small theatre company when not working for the BIG theatre company.
So here we are, firmly settling into a new year. And in reality, the shift from December 31 to January 1 is not a big deal. It's just a new day, really. I usually blow off the New Year as a holiday and just kind of sink into my lfe as normal, not really embracing the different.
Yeah, I'm ready for a new year.
Last year I put my head down and survived all the change.
This year I'd like to embrace my new patterns.
Last year I set aside my own sense of self to hold up the shifts in my family.
This year I'm going to allow my family to settle into their own skin.
Last year I let go of my camera, my writing, my sense of art.
This year I hope to embrace it.
In short, I want to remember how to simply be myself this year. Whatever that means.
Here's how I'm starting:
I'm taking Irene Nam's Simple Soulful Photography Workshop. It started yesterday and I'm working my way through lesson one with a bit of frustration crawling up my spine. The lesson is simple, yes, but embracing it can be hard when you've had your head down for a year.
I'm starting a 365 project, an idea I shunned just last month. I came around when I realized I didn't have to make it a self portrait project and I don't have to expect to upload a photo every single day. I just have to shoot something every single day. I can upload them once a week, if need be.
I'm trying to find a way to spend more time with the small theatre. The big theatre may feed my family but the little one? It feeds my soul. Not sure yet how to accomplish this goal.
On January 1st, as we drove South to home after a week visiting family in the snow, Mark and I talked about the play I haven't finished writing. And we talked our way to how to end it. I think it's a reasonable thing to hope to finish it this year.
Oh, and I'm posting here. I promise to try to do that more.
Mostly, I'm just trying to pick my head up and actually see what's around me.
Wish me luck.